Monday, December 22, 2008

My Wife Is A Prop, However

It seems what while Gordon Brown's children may not be props - though this photo suggests otherwise - he has no problem with his wife being used as a piece of scenery. Back in September we had her 'surprise' introduction for Gordon at the Labour conference, and now we have this photo:
It comes courtesy of the Mirror, and in particular from Kevin Maguire's latest attempt to insert himself as deeply as possible into Gordon Brown's colon. This might just be the most staged photograph in all of human history. Things to look out for:

- Gordon with his jacket off and Sarah in a simple top. It says 'we're serious, but can relax'.
- Gordon's patented 'paedo smile'. The one which proves he is incapable of smiling like a normal person.
- Gordon is wrapping or unwrapping a present, which makes him look stupid either way. If he's unwrapping it, he's doing it at least four days early. And if he's wrapping it, what sort of stupid bastard tries to wrap a present while balancing it on his knees?
- Sarah sitting on the floor to make the whole thing look more relaxed and informal, but it actually looks like Gordon is hogging all the sofa and refusing to budge up.
- The look of admiration on Sarah's face as she gazes up at Gordon, which makes her look like an extra in a Leni Riefenstahl film.
- It's daytime, but Maguire tells us that Gordon is working "a Herculean 12 hours a day." I therefore presume that Gordon Brown is some sort of vampire, who does most of his actual work at night - when he isn't posing for photographs.
- The angle contributes to Gordon's gigantic puppet head looking even more puppety than usual. Not a sign of it being staged, but important to point out.

If you can see any more examples feel free to put them in the comments.

5 comments:

Lord Elvis of Paisley said...

Reminds me of the Cons slogan: However he wraps it up, it's still a tax bombshell.

Dad Mzungu said...

"It's daytime, but Maguire tells us that Gordon is working "a Herculean 12 hours a day." I therefore presume that Gordon Brown is some sort of vampire, who does most of his actual work at night - when he isn't posing for photographs."
Surely, taking promo photos is work, hard work? After all, he has to muster up that grimace - sorry - smile. That must be really hard work.
DM

DC said...

Looking so casual and relaxed in a shirt and tie. Does he ever take it off?

Tuscan Tony said...

The Tuscan reckons the pressie wrapped in white/mottled paper is merely a second, empty flowerpot, bought as a job lot with the one they've stuck the fake tree in. Other than that, the decor of the place makes Karen Matthews' house seem positively homely.

Fidothedog said...

At least he has a home this Christmas, it won't be to long before many are sleeping in tent cities.

Maybe we could call them Brownvilles?